I just finished reading Margaret Wheatley's book, Turning to One Another. Her premise is basic: Once people start having conversations (not just talk at each other) we develop relationships, then community, then peace. Once we know someone's story it is more difficult to fight with them. Hmmm. I guess even in families that may hold true! Knowing the story certainly does help the family/community begin to define boundaries and values by which we will live, love, and fight.

I think her volume is worth reading for interim ministry practicioners because it gets at a high value for congregational study (from Bob's perspective, anyway) that getting the community into dialogue, conversation, is a critical support for the congregation's transitional dynamics (read: Developmental Tasks). See also the new book by Alice Mann and Gil Rendle, Holy Conversations - a congregational study approach that includes conversation as a key element of "data". Yes, finally someone values narrative approach and the risks and excitement of qualatative data.

So anyway, last night I ate supper at Appleby's and took a cue from the book by talking to the server using a different type of conversation starter - I asked her what dreams she had... she responded for her life, career and then I pushed her to ask what kind of person she wanted to become...

We could also ask: what surprises have you had this week? What goals have you accomplished? Are you any closer to finishing one? What do you like about clouds? so go ahead, make some up...

So, after my brief experiment, I realized that if she (actually two shes - there was a servier in training as well) it could lead to a more extended conversation that could include faith and witness. They were "on the clock" and that isn't fair!

So, what has surprised you this week?

Copyright Bob Anderson May 4, 2004